We live three doors down from my adopted mother. My partner helps me attend to many of my mother's needs.
SCENE: On my way out of town to take my adopted mother to my Aunt's funeral, we had the following conversation:
ME: (happy) You know Mom, today is my 15th anniversary.
MOM: (sounding shocked)To who?
ME: (deadpan) You know! 15 years drug free....What do you mean to who?! Who do you think???
MOM: (agitated) Well, I don't count and keep track of how many years it's been.
ME: (sarcastic) Well, that's obvious! Because apparently you can't keep track of who I'm with either!