Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Mother Strikes Again

My Grandson turns 3 this month. His birthday party is going to be at a park. I mentioned this to my adopted mother. She said she wasn't going. Said it was to much sitting in one place for her and then there is the issue of needing a handicap restroom which she doesn't like to deal with.

Now some friend of my brother's calls and says to her that he and several others from the church want to thank my brother because he is directing their church camp this year and would she like to go. All my mother heard was her son's name and the word "DIRECTOR" and her answer was a resounding and deafening YES!!!!  Never mind that she has no idea if she will be within 500 yards of a restroom, and that the camp is located over an hour and a half's drive from her house Suddenly the sitting and restroom issue isn't such an issue any more.

So far, she has mentioned this 4 times since yesterday. Once when she first told me about the call. Then the second time when she called to tell me she wants me to go to the store and buy him a pair of gold cufflinks, then the third time when she called back to tell me to add a gold tie clip to that, then when she called to tell me to go pick up a card.

What kind of card?

"Something with Son on it! :::Pauses::: Or something 'TO THE ONLY MAN IN MY LIFE' because that is what he is."

::Thinking I may throw up at any moment:::  "I mean," I said, "What KIND of card. One that says Congratulations or what?"

She says "No, something that says To DIRECTOR."

I'm like, "Ma! They don't make a card like that!"

"Then get one that says THINKING OF YOU", she says and then adds; "Do you have any solid color wrapping paper like in a gold color?"

"No," I said. "I don't keep paper like that because nobody in my family is a Director."

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