Thursday, October 30, 2008
This election has certainly been the poster child for how an election SHOULDN'T BE CONDUCTED. Outright lies, distortions and negatism by the Republicans has been beyond shameful. It certainly cannot bolster or entice democracy around the world. Watching rallies where masses are gathered and someone shouting 'kill him', why it's a dictator's worst nightmare.
Former President Clinton recently said, " We have to elect a President who will rebuild the American dream, repair a badly shattered financial system, and restore American's standing in the world. And that's the job. Every four years when the American people elect a President they not only vote for a person, they say what they believe the job is. That IS the job. And this country is in a mess. Almost no new jobs, incomes declining, health care cost is doubled, college cost up 75 %, credit card debt going through the roof, home mortgages cratering, home values cratering, the price of gasoline, food and utilities going up. And look at the mess that we have in our finacial system. Compare that to what happened before. It wasn't like this... This is not accidental folks. You know, where I grew up in Arkansas we had a saying that, if you find a turtle on a fence post, chances are it didn't get there by accident. It did not have to be this way. It matters who the President is, it matters what the decisions are, it matters what the policies are...."
And to my way of thinking, the choice should be clear. Barack Obama is the only candidate that can effect changes that will correct the wrong decisions made these past eight years.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Your result for The Personality Defect Test...
You are 29% Rational, 57% Extroverted, 71% Brutal, and 86% Arrogant.
I really need to stop thinking so literally...
Anyway, I MEANT to say that you are the Class Clown, and this means that you are extroverted, mean, and arrogant. You are not very rational, so you gravitate towards things that produce feelings or emotions over thoughts (like fart jokes or spitballs, for instance). You are also an extrovert and rather full of yourself, so of course you want constant attention for yourself and think you are somehow better than others. (Upon hearing the expression "you are full of yourself", you probably also slyly feel the need to ask women if they would like to be "full of yourself" too. I am assuming you have a penis. I often make that assumption, being fond of the penis.) You can also be a bit mean-spirited, and like a class clown you wouldn't hesitate to make a joke at someone else's expense, no matter how terrible it would make them feel. A lot of people probably find your antics annoying, sophomoric, and desperately histrionic. Like some sort of crack-taking hyperactive monkey, you'd do anything, mock anyone, just to get someone to pay attention to you for five seconds. So your personality defects are that you have to be the center of attention, that you don't care about others, and that you are rather irrational and motivated by intuitions. Now stop walking around with those books on your head and sit down this instant! Or else I'll be forced to stand here, hands on my hips, doing nothing once again!
To put it less negatively:
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.
2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted.
3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle.
4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.
Your exact opposite is the Robot.
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
Be sure to take my Sublime Philosophical Crap Test if you are interested in taking a slightly more intellectual test that has just as many insane ramblings as this one does!
I am a self-proclaimed pseudo-intellectual who loves dashes. I enjoy science, philosophy, and fart jokes and water balloons, not necessarily in that order. I spend 95% of my time online, and the other 5% of my time in the bathroom, longing to get back on the computer. If, God forbid, you somehow find me amusing instead of crass and annoying, be sure to check out my blog and my webcomic at SaintGasoline.com.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
And Senator Obama, I wish you would have been less of a gentleman. It's one thing for a bully to kick dirt in your face and ignore it. But when that same bully has the nerve to come back with the beach patrol and ask YOU to apologize for having your face in the way of his foot.....well I say, GET HIM!!!
What Obama should have said:
John, no one likes to raise taxes but, thanks to this war that your administration started, we don't have any choices. I am just not going to raise it on the working people and small businesses of this country. And John, for you to say you aren't going to raise taxes makes me wonder if you're going to pay for the entire war out of your wife's purse.
John, no one cares if your feelings are hurt. You sit here with that snarky smile and thug glint in your eyes when you know you deliberately allowed my middle name to be mocked in a deragatory way, my religion deliberately misstated, and my very life threatened without so much as a peep from you or your running mate. And now you want to ask me to apologize for responding to those slurs? It's true you do have the balls of a Maverick. Unfortunately you don't have the clear mind and eyesight cause it's not going to happen. The news channels have done nothing but show your running mate's silence as well as that of your own during those rallies. I'm sure there were many decent people at your rallies and I hope every one of them wised up and left when they saw the extent to how low the McCain/Palin team will sink.
John, I didn't have to run against the Bush administration four years ago. I'm doing it now thanks to you.
John, I don't have to take on my party. That was your job since you were busy supporting your own party.
John, if I wanted you to speak for me at this debate, I would have paid you to be my stand in. Since I didn't, let me be perfectly clear. I AM GOING TO BE THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.
That is all.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
On National Coming out Day and in honor of the recent victories in California and now Conneticut, it seems appropriate to reflect on the fact that Love is what is important. To be afraid that the human race will disappear if gays and lesbians are allowed to marry is just plain stupid. Obviously, there are more people now than ever before and we've always been here. So lighten up world and let us love.
Friday, October 10, 2008
By HOWARD ALTMAN | The Tampa Tribune
Published: October 10, 2008
Updated: 01:57 pm
TAMPA - A letter carrier reaching into a New Tampa mailbox was bitten by an Eastern diamondback rattlesnake about 11:40 this morning, according to Tampa Fire Rescue and the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office.
The 66-year-old carrier drove himself back to the New Tampa post office at 16350 Bruce B. Downs Blvd., where 911 was summoned. He was taken to University Community Hospital on Fletcher Avenue in good condition, Tampa Fire Rescue said.
His identity was not available.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
My challenge to you: Take 30 seconds right now. Close your eyes and imagine exactly what our country will feel like with President Obama. Imagine how good it will feel. Imagine whatever it is about him that you desire. Imagine the pride. Imagine the diplomacy. Imagine the peace. Imagine the wind mills and the clean cars. Imagine the citizen groups. Imagine whatever it is that drew you to support Obama. Imagine what your life will look like. Just 30 seconds. Do it several times a day. We can shift and change the vibration of this country with positive visions just like this. It's only 30 seconds a few times a day. Surely you can find the time. It will feel good. Just try it and keep doing it.
Then pass this on to all of your Obama supporter friends. If we all take 30 seconds several times a day to shift into this positive vibration, it will work. You wait and see!
He ventured forth to bring light to the world
The anointed one's pilgrimage to the Holy Land is a miracle in action - and a blessing to all his faithful followers
From The Times, written by Gerald Baker
And it came to pass, in the eighth year of the reign of the evil Bush the Younger (The Ignorant), when the whole land from the Arabian desert to the shores of the Great Lakes had been laid barren, that a Child appeared in the wilderness.
The Child was blessed in looks and intellect. Scion of a simple family, offspring of a miraculous union, grandson of a typical white person and an African peasant. And yea, as he grew, the Child walked in the path of righteousness, with only the occasional detour into the odd weed and a little blow.
When he was twelve years old, they found him in the temple in the City of Chicago, arguing the finer points of community organisation with the Prophet Jeremiah and the Elders. And the Elders were astonished at what they heard and said among themselves: "Verily, who is this Child that he opens our hearts and minds to the audacity of hope?"
In the great Battles of Caucus and Primary he smote the conniving Hillary, wife of the deposed King Bill the Priapic and their barbarian hordes of Working Class Whites.
And so it was, in the fullness of time, before the harvest month of the appointed year, the Child ventured forth - for the first time - to bring the light unto all the world.
He traveled fleet of foot and light of camel, with a small retinue that consisted only of his loyal disciples from the tribe of the Media. He ventured first to the land of the Hindu Kush, where the
Taliban had harboured the viper of al-Qaeda in their bosom, raining terror on all the world.
And the Child spake and the tribes of Nato immediately loosed the Caveats that had previously bound them. And in the great battle that ensued the forces of the light were triumphant. For as long as the Child stood with his arms raised aloft, the enemy suffered great blows and the threat of terror was no more.
From there he went forth to Mesopotamia where he was received by the great ruler al-Maliki, and al-Maliki spake unto him and blessed his Sixteen Month Troop Withdrawal Plan even as the imperial warrior Petraeus tried to destroy it.
And lo, in Mesopotamia, a miracle occurred. Even though the Great Surge of Armour that the evil Bush had ordered had been a terrible mistake, a waste of vital military resources and doomed to end in disaster, the Child's very presence suddenly brought forth a great victory for the forces of the light.
And the Persians, who saw all this and were greatly fearful, longed to speak with the Child and saw that the Child was the bringer of peace. At the mention of his name they quickly laid aside their intrigues and beat their uranium swords into civil nuclear energy ploughshares.
From there the Child went up to the city of Jerusalem, and entered through the gate seated on an ass. The crowds of network anchors who had followed him from afar cheered "Hosanna" and waved great palm fronds and strewed them at his feet.
In Jerusalem and in surrounding Palestine, the Child spake to the Hebrews and the Arabs, as the Scripture had foretold. And in an instant, the lion lay down with the lamb, and the Israelites and Ishmaelites ended their long enmity and lived for ever after in peace.
As word spread throughout the land about the Child's wondrous works, peoples from all over flocked to hear him; Hittites and Abbasids; Obamacons and McCainiacs; Cameroonians and Blairites.
And they told of strange and wondrous things that greeted the news of the Child's journey. Around the world, global temperatures began to decline, and the ocean levels fell and the great warming was over.
The Great Prophet Algore of Nobel and Oscar, who many had believed was the anointed one, smiled and told his followers that the Child was the one generations had been waiting for.
And there were other wonderful signs. In the city of the Street at the Wall, spreads on interbank interest rates dropped like manna from Heaven and rates on credit default swaps fell to the ground as dead birds from the almond tree, and the people who had lived in foreclosure were able to borrow again.
Black gold gushed from the ground at prices well below $140 per barrel. In hospitals across the land the sick were cured even though they were uninsured. And all because the Child had pronounced it.
And this is the testimony of one who speaks the truth and bears witness to the truth so that you might believe. And he knows it is the truth for he saw it all on CNN and the BBC and in the pages of The New York Times.
Then the Child ventured forth from Israel and Palestine and stepped onto the shores of the Old Continent. In the land of Queen Angela of Merkel, vast multitudes gathered to hear his voice, and he preached to them at length.
But when he had finished speaking his disciples told him the crowd was hungry, for they had had nothing to eat all the hours they had waited for him.
And so the Child told his disciples to fetch some food but all they had was five loaves and a couple of frankfurters. So he took the bread and the frankfurters and blessed them and told his disciples to feed the multitudes. And when all had eaten their fill, the scraps filled twelve baskets.
Thence he travelled west to Mount Sarkozy. Even the beauteous Princess Carla of the tribe of the Bruni was struck by awe and she was great in love with the Child, but he was tempted not.
On the Seventh Day he walked across the Channel of the Angles to the ancient land of the hooligans. There he was welcomed with open arms by the once great prophet Blair and his successor, Gordon the Leper, and his successor, David the Golden One.
And suddenly, with the men appeared the archangel Gabriel and the whole host of the heavenly choir, ranks of cherubim and seraphim, all praising God and singing: "Yes, We Can."